Are Female Cats Friendly?

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There is a lot of misinformation on the internet about female cats.  In some places, they will say female cats are not that friendly.  In other places, they will say that female cats are friendly.  The truth is there are quite a few factors that need to be considered. The bottom line is that most people who own a female cat have a spayed female cat.  So, are female cats friendly?

Spayed female cats are friendly when they are treated nicely and are placed in a good environment.  Cat gender is not the most crucial factor regarding friendliness.  Cat breed, how the cat is raised, and the environment are more important factors regarding cat friendliness.

People generally also wonder if male cats are friendlier than female cats. I do some exploring here also.  Read on to learn more about female cats and friendliness!

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Cat Breed and Personality

When it comes to how friendly or unfriendly your female cat is, the breed may have something to do with it. Some female cats of a specific breed are believed to have friendlier personalities than cats of other breeds.

Personally, I have a female domestic shorthair cat.  Domestic Shorthair cats are not known for their friendliness, but my cat is quite friendly.  That being said, she is not as friendly as some cat breeds that are well-known to be friendly.

If you are wondering what breeds cat lovers claim are the most affectionate, they would be the following: 

It is essential to keep in mind that even female cats that you do not know the breed of can be friendly and affectionate with you. So give her a chance to make a connection with you and provide a happy household for her.

How Does the Environment Affect a Cat’s Behavior?

Female Cat

The environment can play a large role in your cat’s behavior.  This could be the environment you adopted your cat from or the environment you place your cat.

Did you adopt it out of an abusive situation? Was it living on the streets before coming to your home? If either of those scenarios applies, then it might take some time for your cat to warm up to you. But, again, this has nothing to do with it being male or female.

What you can do is provide an environment where your cat has every opportunity to flourish. Creating a home environment where your cat is free to explore and play without fear of punishment will go a long way towards it becoming more relaxed and friendly over time. 

Help Your Cat Become Socialized

Much of what determines how friendly a cat is depends on how well it is socialized. For example, if your cat roams outside for much of the day (which I don’t recommend), it will not have the opportunity to get to know you and learn how to calm down.

If you want a cat to be affectionate, then you must first model that behavior to them – and even then, sometimes they may not be affectionate cats.

If your cat stays indoors with you much of the time, then it will have the opportunity to learn how to play and cuddle all at the same time. This will change its attitude towards you.

Once again, this has nothing to do with gender. Also, keep in mind that cats have their own personality. Some will naturally be shy or aggressive, while others will be friendly and affectionate. 

Is a Female Cat Spayed?

This answer may also help predict how friendly your cat is likely to be. For example, many people have observed that female cats who are not spayed are not as affectionate or friendly with humans or sometimes other felines. 

The reason why non-spayed female cats might not be as friendly as you would like is because of their hormones or due to a pregnancy. This means that most of their energy and focus may go to finding a mate or their kittens. As a result, they are not as interested in human companionship.

Are Female Cats Mean?

One final question to consider about this topic is whether female cats are mean. Any animal can be mean or friendly. Cats are no exception. Some people think cats are meanwhile dogs are friendly, but we know that there are many vicious dogs in the world.

The reality is that cats can be just as friendly as dogs. It comes down to how you treat them. Spend time with them and shed the stereotype that they are so mean. Each female cat has a unique personality, so it is up to you to make a lasting connection with them. 

Why are Female Cats Not Friendly?

If you meet a spayed female cat that is not friendly, there may be some telling reasons.  Here are some possible reasons that a female cat is not friendly:

  • Trauma
  • Chaotic Environment
  • Raised Poorly
  • Feral or Stray

You’ll notice that I did not put gender.  The gender of a desexed cat really should not impact the friendliness of the cat.  If the cat is not desexed, the female cat may not be friendly due to the above reasons (or more) or hormones.  If you wonder how to deal with a mean cat, you should contact an animal behaviorist or your veterinarian.

Do Cats Pick a Favorite Person?

Sometimes cats choose a favorite person.  This could be due to the breed of the cat or due to the compassion it receives from someone.  This could also be due to a specific person feeding the cat.  I do not doubt that my cat loves me a little bit more because I feed her every day. 

One cat breed well-known to pick a specific person is the SiameseSiamese cats are known for many things, such as being intelligent, vocal, and looking cool.  But, they are also known to become attached to a specific person.  So, the attachment could be due to the cat breed.

Are 2 Cats Better Than 1?

Sometimes two cats are better than one. For example, if your cat is the type that gets attached and needs company, then a second cat will almost certainly help. In addition, there are specific cat breeds that do better if you have a second cat. 

My cat is a Domestic Shorthair, and I am pretty confident she likes being a single cat.  She is always chilled out when I am not at home and never gives me any cause for concern that she is lonely. 

In addition to the Siamese, which I mentioned above, another cat breed that does better with company (aka a person, another cat, or even a cat-friendly dog) is the Siberian cat.

Is it Okay to Kiss Your Cat on The Head?

Personally, I think you should avoid kissing your cat on the face.  Instead, I will sometimes kiss my cat on the head.  That being said, my cat keeps herself exceptionally clean. However, sometimes cats can carry germs that can cause illness if they enter a human’s body.  So, you should wash your hands regularly after handling cats and consider this when you decide if you want to kiss your cat.

Are Female Cats as Affectionate as Male Cats?

This is always a difficult question to answer because it comes down to personal opinion. There is no scientific basis to say that a male cat is more affectionate than a female cat. Many cat lovers refuse to get a female cat because of the perception that they are mean and not very friendly to humans. That is not true.

When it comes to a cat being affectionate with you, it often boils down to connection. No two cats are the same. One may connect with you, while another may not. That does not have anything to do with their gender. To say that a female cat is not friendly is to discount personality differences, not to mention inherent differences in breed and environment.

Inherent Differences Between Males and Females

Like with humans, there are some notable differences between male and female cats that are helpful to know. To begin, here are a few examples that may help explain why so many people claim that male cats are friendlier overall. 

  • Male Maine Coon Cats – It has been noted that males are more affectionate than females within this breed. Male Coon cats love to be the center of attention, while it is noted that females are more independent and easier going. 
  • Male British Shorthair Cats – Many people have observed that male British Shorthair cats are more open and playful with their owners than female shorthair cats tend to be. 
  • Male Siamese Cats – Again, some Siamese cat owners claim that males are noticeably cuddlier and more willing to vie for attention than female Siamese cats are.

These three examples notwithstanding, breed does not dictate how friendly your cat is going to be. This means that you cannot say a male cat will be friendlier than a female, or vice versa.

If you have been around cats for any length of time, you will know that some are naturally more outgoing and nice than others. This is not something you can train a cat to do either. It is part of their personality. You may think that the kitten you adopt is cute and cuddly today, but that is no guarantee she will grow into an adult who sits by your side all day.


Female cats can be friendly.  Female cats can be just as friendly as male cats. There is no basis for saying otherwise. While there may be some extenuating factors to consider, such as breed and environment, it usually comes down to how well you treat your cat and how hard you are willing to work on the relationship.

If you liked this article, please check out a few more:

  • Do Cats Like Cat Strollers? (The Honest Truth):  Click Here.
  • Are Male Cats Friendlier? (Powerful Information):  Click Here.
  • Are Female Cats Harder To Take Care Of? The Real Truth:  Click Here.

Christopher Carlson

I have an Domestic Shorthair Tabby named Charlotte. She is full of energy when she isn't sleeping most of the day. I share what I learn about cats on this site.

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